Youmayhavegrownuplivingwithlotsofsiblings,orthismaybeyourfirsttimesharingyourlivingspacewithsomeoneelse.Whilehavingaroommateinevitablyhasitschallenges,itcanalsobeagreatpartofyourcollegeexperience.
Followthesetentipstomakesureyouandyourroommatekeepthingspleasantandsupportivethroughouttheyear(orevenyears!).
想在同住的这一年甚至数年里,大家和睦互助,不妨试试下面的十个要诀。
1.Beclearaboutyourexpectationsfromthebeginning
1.“丑话”得要说在前
Doyouknowinadvancethatyouhateitwhensomeonehitsthesnoozebutton1fifteentimeseverymorningThatyou’reaneatfreakThatyouneedtenminutestoyourselfbeforetalkingtoanyoneafteryouwakeupLetyourroommateknowassoonasyoucanaboutyourlittlequirksandpreferences.It’snotfairtoexpecthimorhertopickupon2themrightaway,andcommunicatingwhatyouneedisoneofthebestwaystoeliminateproblemsbeforetheybecomeproblems.
你事先知道自己讨厌别人每天早上按掉15次闹铃还不起床吗?知道自己有洁癖吗?知道自己睡醒之后还得再过10分钟才想开口说话吗?这些小小怪癖和喜好都要尽早跟室友说明。想让别人马上就觉察到这些细节,未免强人所难。良策之一是坦诚相告,防患于未然。
[2]pickupon注意到(不容易注意的事情)。
2.Addressproblemswhenthey’relittle
2.及时化解小矛盾
Isyourroommatealwaysforgettingherstufffortheshower,andtakingyoursAreyourclothesbeingbor-rowedfasterthanyoucanwashthemAddressingthingsthatbugyouwhilethey’restilllittlecanhelpyourroommatebeawareofsomethingshemaynototherwiseknow.Andaddressinglittlethingsismucheasierthanaddressingthemafterthey’vebecomebig.
同寝的姑娘洗澡时是不是经常忘记带洗浴用品,拿你的来用?才洗好的衣服,是不是马上又会被一件接一件地借走?烦心之事虽小,也要及时提醒,不然她可能还浑然不觉。小事说开了很容易化解,积怨成仇就不好办了。
3.Respectyourroommate’sstuff
3.他人物品别乱动
Thismayseemsimple,butit’sprobablyoneofthebiggestreasonswhyroommatesexperienceconflict.Don’tthinkhe’llmindifyouborrowhiscleatsforaquicksoccergame3Forallyouknow,youjuststeppedoveranuncrossableline.Don’tborrow,use,ortakeanythingwithoutgettingpermissionfirst.
这点看似简单,可如果做不到,却是室友间失和的主要原因之一。不过穿他的钉鞋去踢会儿球,他不会在意吧?你可要知道,你已经越过了一条不该逾越的界线。除非事先征得本人同意,否则不要借、用、拿室友的任何个人物品。
[3]quicksoccergame一种小型足球比赛,参加人数较正规比赛少(如每队五人)。
4.Bemindfulofwhoyoubringintoyourroom–andhowoften
4.来客不可将人扰
Youmaylovehavingyourstudygroupintoyourroom.Butyourroommatemaynot.Bemindfulofhowoftenyoubringpeopleover.Ifyourroommatestudiesbestinthequiet,andyoustudybestinagroup,canyoualternatewhohits4thelibraryandwhogetstheroom
也许你喜欢叫上学习小组的同学来寝室一起学习,可你的室友未必喜欢。注意:不要频繁带人进寝室。如果室友觉得安静氛围最利学习,而你学习时喜欢与人讨论,你们不妨轮流使用寝室,一个人要用寝室,另一个人就去图书馆。
[4]hit去(某地)。
5.Lockthedoorandwindows
5.寝室门窗要锁好
Thismayseemlikeithasnothingtodowithroommaterelationships,buthowwouldyoufeelifyourroommate’slaptopgotstolenduringthetensecondsittookyoutorundownthehall5OrviceversaLockingyourdoorandwindowsisacriticalpartofkeepingsafeoncampus.
这点看似跟室友间相处得好与不好没什么关系,可也许就是你去走廊打个转的工夫、也就十秒钟,室友的笔记本电脑就让人偷走了,到那时你作何感想?如果这个丢东西的人换成是你,你又作何感想?在校园生活中,要保障人身财产安全,锁好门窗可是至关重要的一环。
[5]hall此处同hallway,走廊、过道。
6.Befriendly,withoutexpectingtobebestfriends
6.室友无须变挚友
Don’tgointo6yourroommaterelationshipthinkingthatyouaregoingtobebestfriendsforthetimeyou’reatschool.Itmayhappen,butexpectingitsetsbothofyouupfor7trouble.Youshouldbefriendlywithyourroommatebutalsomakesureyouhaveyourownsocialcircles.
不必费心费力地想把室友变成大学时期最好的朋友。虽然不是不可能,但期待过高只会给彼此带来困扰。要与室友和睦相处,但也要有自己的社交圈子。
[7]setsomebodyupfor把某人置于某种境地。
7.Beopentonewthings
7.乐于接受新事物
Yourroommatemaybefromsomeplaceyou’veneverheardof.Theymayhaveareligionorlifestylethatiscompletelydifferentfromyourown.Beopentonewideasandexperiences,especiallyasitrelatestowhatyourroommatebringsintoyourlife.That’swhyyouwenttocollegeinthefirstplace,right!
也许你的室友从一个你闻所未闻的地方而来,你们的宗教信仰和生活方式可能完全不同。要以开放的心态看待新观念、尝试新事物,当这些是因你的室友而接触到的时候,尤应如此。这不正是你上大学的初衷吗?
8.Stayopentochange
8.勇于改变应万变
Youshouldexpecttolearnandgrowandchangeduringyourtimeatschool.Andthesameshouldhappentoyourroommate,ifallgoeswell.Asthesemesterprogresses,realizethingswillchangeforbothofyou.Becomfortableaddressingthingsthatunexpectedlycomeup,settingnewrules,andbeingflexibletoyourchangingenvironment.
大学期间,你要自我学习、自我成长、自我改变。如果一切顺利的话,你的室友也应如此。要明白,随着学期向前推进,大家都会有所改变。意料之外的事时有发生,要从容应对。要定新规,随机应变。
9.Addressproblemswhenthey’rebig,too
9.矛盾升级得处理
Youmaynothavebeentotallyhonest8withtip#2,oryoumaysuddenlyfindyourselfwitharoommatewhogoeswild9afterbeingshyandquietthefirsttwomonths.Eitherway,ifsomethinggetstobeabigproblemquickly,dealwithitassoonasyoucan.
也许你并没有照着第二条要诀说的那样去做,又或许,你突然发现,头两个月还腼腆文静的室友原来是个暴脾气——无论哪种情况,一旦事情有愈演愈烈的趋势,要尽快处理。
[8]honest如实的,不作假的。
[9]be/gowild感情强烈的(尤指生气、激动或高兴)。
10.Ifnothingelse,followthegoldenrule
10.黄金法则要记牢
Treatyourroommatelikeyou’dliketobetreated.Nomatterwhatyourrelationshipisattheendoftheyear,youcantakecomfortknowingyouactedlikeanadultandtreatedyourroommatewithrespect.
你希望别人怎么对待你,你就怎么对待别人。待学年将尽,无论你们相交深浅,只要你展现出了成年人的气度,给予了室友应有的尊重,那就可以安心了。